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Imagine a relationship where both you and your partner experience deeply satisfying sexual intimacy every time. That’s the heart of what Drew Manning and I discuss in our conversation on sexual intimacy in long-term relationships.
We shed light on the age-old Daoist practice of “Daoist Thrusting,” which I’ve tailored to address the needs of modern relationships. We dive deep, exploring the three main components: pelvic rocking, depth of thrust, and a timing strategy based on counting. Mastering these elements can significantly enhance your sexual satisfaction, promoting a stronger emotional bond with your partner.
We also offer a practical demonstration of Daoist Thrusting, giving you a clearer perspective on effectively using and applying this technique in the bedroom. This hands-on demonstration allows you to visualize the technique better, making it easier for you to incorporate it into your relationship.
Watching the video will equip you with the tools to transform your relationship, fostering a deeper connection with your partner and enhancing overall sexual and emotional satisfaction. Check it out today.
Full Transcript
Drew: All right. What’s up everyone? Drew Manning here from Fit2Fat2Fit with my good friend Susan Bratton. How are you doing today?
Susan: I’m so good, drew. I’m so happy to be with you here in Kona, Hawaii.
Drew: Beautiful, right?
Susan: Oh yeah, it is.
Drew: So today we’re gonna be talking about something very interesting, an ancient Daoist practice that you’ve kind of modernized, if you will. And what’s cool about this is this whole series, this you know, this Love Muscle series that we’re creating, is tackling not just the physical side of sexual intimacy, but there’s also a mental, emotional, maybe even spiritual component. So maybe describe what this Daoist, ancient Daoist practice is.
Susan: Sure.
Drew: And what it, the problems that it solves.
Susan: Well in a nutshell, I call it Daoist Thrusting.
Drew: Mmmmm….
Susan: And it is a love making technique. And it’s a technique for intercourse because for a lot of people, and I know you know this, from, I’m sure your own experience that a lot of guys have difficulty lasting long enough during intercourse that’s really, really common. One in four men want more stamina. And women on the other hand, struggle to attain satisfaction.
Drew: Yes.
Susan: From intercourse. And so you’ve got kind of lovers on two ends of the spectrum. And the thing that I don’t like about that is that if you can’t, if you’re in a long-term monogamous relationship, a heterosexual couple, a man and a woman, and you’re in a long-term relationship and she’s not satisfied from intercourse, how long is she gonna wanna do it?
Drew: Mm. Yeah,
Susan: I, one of the things I say is that every time you have intercourse with a woman and she doesn’t achieve satisfaction, it’s another brick in the wall of your future sexless relationship. Cause she could do it maybe a decade. But if you wanna be married, I’ve been married 30 years this year. To Sir Tim. And it was 10 years into our marriage when I had never had an orgasm from intercourse.
Drew: Whoa.
Susan: And we were gonna get divorced because what was wrong? We were making money, we had good jobs. It was intimacy for us. It was the fact that I was doing everything I could to get out of having sex with him, and he was trying everything he could to get me to, to have sex with him. And when we really learned that, love making is not something that you’re born knowing. Making a baby we can figure out. Tab A into slot B doesn’t take a lot of brain. But. Really satisfying lovemaking that spiritual love making. The love making where you too become one. Where you’re dissolved into bliss, where you can’t tell where your pleasure starts and your lover’s pleasure ends. Where you’re just on what I like to call the up upward pleasure spiral. I think about it like DNA helix where
Drew: Yeah,
Susan: two lovers are just. Swirling around together. Connecting with source, with, yeah, with nature, with Gaia, with God, whatever word you want it to be. I got goosebumps saying that. Can you see the goose? My,
Drew: I can see the goosebumps.
Susan: It really, it’s my thing. Passionate, love making. I love to say I transform having sex into making love.
Drew: It’s a difference.
Susan: That’s what I love. Heart connected, conscious. We’re present with each other. Love making. And so I set out to fix what I thought was the biggest problem in sex, which was we’re focused on intercourse being kind of like the jewel in the crown of having sex. But guys are struggling to last long enough and women are struggling to have orgasm. And so I’d learned this Daoist Tech, it’s 2000 years old. It’s a publicly available document, you know? But I said, well, there’s some things about it that I could really improve on this Daoist thrusting technique, because I teach a lot of penis skills. Men’s intercourse techniques, and I teach a lot of women’s intercourse techniques, ways to move your body that really feel good. So this Daoist technique, is a, it’s an intro intercourse technique that has three components, which you’re gonna demo.
Drew: I don’t know what I’m signing up for.
Susan: He knows, don’t believe him. He knows what he gonna have to do. And you game. You’re a brave man.
Drew: I think so. Let’s see.
Susan: He’ll be fine.
Drew: I’m excited. I’m excited to learn. I’m always about learning and I think there’s opportunity for growth in all areas of life. Yeah, and I think it’s. If you do want this mind blowing sex that you’re talking about, you have to be open to trying new things. Right? And so, yeah, I think I’m, I’m open to learn and I hope other people out there are open to learn as well. So I’m excited to hear about this Daoist thrusting.
Susan: Yes, exactly. Yes. So the link is gonna be to. You know, we’re gonna show and tell as much as we can here, but I have a free download. . On your MoreDrew.com page
Drew: Yep.
Susan: Where you can download the whole thing, because I get into more than just what’s the, so there’s three components to the practice, and the first one is a pelvic rocking technique. So that it, it feels even better when you’re inside her. I’ll give you like the trick for that. And then the, and some guys are naturally doing this one, so don’t be surprised if a lot of your, a lot of your fans are like, yeah, yeah, I’ve got that one. But the second one is a depth of thrust concept. Which is that there are shallow thrusts and there are deep thrusts. And then the third component is, a count. And do you know that concept of it’s like consciously, unconsciously competent, where you start out learning how to do a golf swing or drive a car? And you’re. Un you’re, you’re consciously incompetent.
Drew: Yes.
Susan: Incompetent. Like you’re like, I dunno what I’m doing. I got a gas and break and look in the rear view mirror and look ahead and do all this stuff, you know? Well, that’s consciously incompetent. But you get over time the muscle memory.
Drew: Yes.
Susan: Like any other thing. Where you become unconsciously competent at something.
Drew: Yes.
Susan: So when you first start out with Daoist thrusting, you’re doing this 10 count technique. But over time you just feel it. And it doesn’t matter whether it’s. Five and five or four and six or whatever it might be. You’re just doing it naturally because you’re reading the biofeedback of your woman. And she’s gotten so responsive to you that it just starts to flow.
Drew: Gotcha.
Susan: So those are the three pieces. So, . I could break that down right now, or if you have,
Drew: Yeah, let’s do the, I say we, we pull out the yoga mask, we do some demonstrations. You, you kind of show me first and then I will practice it and great. See how it goes.
Susan: . That sounds good. All right. Here we go. Yoga mat time.
Drew: All right, so now we’re actually going to do the thing.
Susan: Do the thing.
Drew: Do the thing. The Daoist thrusting. We’re gonna three things. The three things. So do you wanna show us what, like what do we do here?
Susan: Yeah, so the very have idea thing, I know, see, he’s a Guinea pig and he loves it. All right. So the first one I’m gonna hold onto you because I. Tore that MCL in Big Sky.
Drew: Oh, .
Susan: And I still noticed that when I was demonstrating the pelvic rocking, it was making it wobbly. So I’m just gonna, hang on. So basically the first one is that you want to, so this is for the masculine. But the woman can meet him in this as well. . And it’s where you’re doing, you’re kind of bending down like this and you’re lifting your pelvis up like this. So the move is like a circle type of a thing. I felt my knee wobble, so I’m glad I held off.
Drew: Careful.
Susan: So, Instead of a guy typically going er.
Drew: Like back and forth,
Susan: which men are tight. And I was hoping you could give the guys a couple of, you know, like psoas, releasers and hip openers. That you might recommend for this.
Drew: Yes.
Susan: But then showing that hip drop. So go ahead and show the pelvic rock. Right. Exactly. That’s what you’re trying to do and you wanna make it, you, you get smoother and smoother over time. It really like, you want it to be like, like butter
Drew: A wave.
Susan: Just like you want it to be like a wave. And what you’re doing in inside the, a lot of people think the vagina is like a tube, cuz it’s called a canal. It’s more like a pocket. I like to think about it as a little pocket. And so when you’re going in, what you’re doing is you’re sliding down along the bottom of the pocket and you’re, so it really is like a wave. You’re coming down the bottom of the pocket and coming across the top of the pocket.
Drew: Yes.
Susan: And coming down and up like that. That feels particularly good because it’s activating all of the areas inside. A lot of people think that inside the vagina is just kind of, doesn’t have a lot of sensation. The only reason it doesn’t have sensation is that it’s never been touched and pleasured, and, you, you create neural pathways to your brain by stimulating and giving sensation to the pocket in all different locations. So a woman who’s like, I don’t feel anything, just gimme a few more chances, honey, you will start to feel something. You will begin to feel, yeah, we’re awakening the sensation by doing that. So for most women, because the pocket has a little round muscle on the outside of the pocket that’s called the vaginal sphincter muscle. It’s actually called the introital sphincter. That’s the real name of it. I like to use real anatomical terms because I think the more we understand about our partner’s anatomy and our own anatomy the, the better we can work them together. . To make them really nice. So the sphincter, especially when you’re working with older women, it can get a little sensitive. It doesn’t like so much friction. Right. So when you see porn, Which is a bad idea for how to have sex. They’re just, it’s all like in and out and in and out and pounding. And in this particular case, with the thrust in time, really what you’re doing is you’re kind of scooping, rolling, waving, it’s soft, and you’re don’t always pull all the way out and go all the the way back in. It’s much more sensitive and connected. You’re really feeling her. With your member. . So the pelvic rock is number one. . . The second thing, and, and I think the best, another way to do that, and I was hoping what you could do is do cat cow. . Because when a person’s like, , I don’t really get, if I’m doing it right, , then what you wanna do is you wanna do your cat cow. And that really, if the more you can kind of like stretch and pull up and suck your gut way up in there. And then pull down. So now if you think about it, that’s the movement. If you just did a real fast cat cow, you’re basically, that’s the movement.
Drew: Gotcha.
Susan: So then you feel in your body in a different way. And that’s usually how you’re making love to a woman is you’re down here anyway. So that’s like, oh, . I get it. So like I could show you in, I could show you on the standing, but it’s easier to learn it when you’re doing that.
Drew: Gotcha.
Susan: So now you think, , now I’m doing that inside of my love, and I’m thinking, I’m doing the wave, I’m stroking the top and I’m going down and I’m stroking the top.
Drew: Gotcha.
Susan: And then you can see how different that is than how most people are probably approaching intercourse. So that’s number one. Number two is the count.
Drew: The count. 10 count.
Susan: Did you, so the count is a 10 count. . And you’re like, can, you can do a 10 count. She’s like a 10 count. Count. I dunno.
Drew: One. Two. Four. Just kidding.
Susan: I know.
Drew: It’s a lot of work.
Susan: I know. Well, remember we talked about the unconscious coffee shop you get where you’re not, you don’t have to count. I’m, it’s really just a get. The concept. And so the concept is that you’re gonna do a series of strokes. And the third thing is the short and long strokes. The sha shallow and deep strokes. I’m gonna get to that next, but you’re doing them in a 10 count. And so you start out with nine short or shallow strokes with one long deep stroke. And then eight short, shallow. Two Long deep. 7 7, 3 3 6 4. By the time you get to five five, She’s gonna have an orgasm.
Drew: Oh wow. Really?
Susan: Yes. Now remember I told you that thrust in time is like the technique that I give away, that more people email me and DM me back with exclamation points after their appreciation. It’s because for the first time, their woman is orgasming.
Drew: Gotcha.
Susan: From intercourse, and they’re like, Ooh, we’ve got a chance now. She’s not gonna stop having sex with me, so, That’s the count. And you just do the best you can. And one of the great things about it is that she’s literally gonna be like, she’s gonna be like when you get to, you know, like four, I gotta come over on the thing. When you get to four, she’s gonna be gimme five, gimme five, gimme five. She’s gonna beating on you for another long run and you’re gonna be like, no baby, you have to wait. So it tantalizing her. Because really what you’re doing is you’re toggling her nervous system, the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system. And when you toggle it and you give her a little, and then you go back to the shallow strokes. And you give her some more shallows and then you give her some long strokes. And she’s like, yes, that’s what I want. And then you go back to shorts and she’s like, no, I want that. What you’re doing is you’re getting her to reach, or what we call it our expanded orgasm practice. Peaking. . And when you get her to reach, it brings her arousal up.
She wants more. She gets more turned on. So really, it’s a really great trick because you’re actually just getting her more and more turned on, the slower you go. So as I told you, yeah, I grew up in Pennsylvania. And we have Pennsylvania Dutch people there. . The Amish. Oh and they have this funny little phrase that is the hurrier I go, the behinder, I get. Like the faster I try to get stuff done, the less I get done.
Drew: Yes.
Susan: This is how Daoist thrusting works. It’s like slow.
Drew: Gotcha.
Susan: You just goes slow and you, you get her to the point where she just is like, wants it. And then when you give it to her, she’s like, ah, gotcha. It’s so nice.
Drew: So you just go through that like multiple times, the 10 count and you just recycle that.
Susan: You may never get past. Five and five. Oh, . . And then let me talk a little bit more about the shallow and deep strokes.
Drew: Sure.
Susan: Because going back to the pocket. Right. So when you do the shallow strokes, so a lot of guys, what they’re thinking is, I’ve gotta do deep. Deep. Deep all the time. And now when you do the shallow strokes, they’re not deep, they’re the opposite. They’re just kind of in the entrance because, I know you’ve heard how the entrance to a woman’s vagina has a lot of sensitive nerve.
Drew: Yeah, that’s what I’ve heard.
Susan: It’s true. Although the whole vaginal pocket has a lot of sensitive nerve endings. But a lot of times, guys are in a hurry to give her all this incredible pleasure. And so they just plunge right in.
Drew: Yes.
Susan: And when you begin with those nine shallow strokes, you wanna be thinking that you’re just basically tantalizing and teasing her. You’re just, it’s like just the tip. Mm. First it. It’s not even just the tip. Oh, I know. It’s like, oh honey, just the tip.
Drew: No, it makes sense for that.
Susan: Oh, right. Just the tip. That’s never gonna work. But when you start with the nine shallow strokes, the first few of those nine don’t even go in yet. Like really what you want is for a woman to pull you in. Like she will literally. Pull you in. She’ll go like that if you warm her up. And so for a lot of guys, they’re so thinking that what they need to be doing is that whole pressure thing that they don’t ever give her the opportunity to just kind of like want you in her. And so when you start out really small on the outside of that sphincter muscle, and then you slowly come in and then you adjust the tip and it’s just short and.
It’s slow. So slow. Like the more slow you can do it.
Drew: The better.
Susan: The better. Mm. And especially if you’re also telling her how beautiful she is, how much you want her. Mm, how good she feels. All the loving verbal things that open her heart to you. Then it becomes really, really nice. So you do the shallow strokes and then when you, when you do the deep stroke, They’re not a pounding.
So the,
Drew: yeah,
Susan: outside of the vulva. The outer area where the labia are, they take about 20 minutes of solid pleasuring to really get them filled with blood. . So men have fast ducting hemodynamics, they get an erection very quickly. Women have the same amount of erectile tissue. Where the, we’re the innies, not the outies we talked about that on another segment. But we are slow. Everything has to seep in. We don’t have that straight shot like your banana. And so when, if you were to do the deep thrusts and kind of pound against her outer labia, it will not be pleasurable. What you wanna do is you wanna think about how you’re going into that pocket and sliding back, but almost in this kind of, almost like a coaxing and awakening way. So in the beginning, this. Strokes are really lovely and delicate, and you wanna connect your man cannon, your member. To your heart. So that’s another thing about Daoist practices is that they’re very connected, very what other people might call tantric or spiritual. And so when you think about these two things being connected, then you are pouring your love into her waves of your love are being poured into her. And then over time, you can put a little more pressure on the outside as you’re ramping up the thrusts, as you’re getting to the fives and the sixes and things like that. Then you can put, you can press a little bit more.
Drew: Gotcha.
Susan: With the pressing will, help bring the blood in, but never pounding. The pounding is, For the next day. You know, it’s like you gotta build a woman up for that. And so it’s those, it’s really those things. It’s the, the giving her the short, shallow with the long that make her want more. Thinking about it as a pocket that you’re sending a wave of love into. And what was the third one? The strokes, the timing, and the rock. Yeah, that’s it. It’s those three things. That’s the Daoist thrusting. . You can do it in any position. You get really good at it together, and then what you’ll find is that as she becomes more confident that she can have orgasms from intercourse, then she’ll be able to start having more and more of them. You’ll get into a rhythm and a connection where she becomes multiorgasmic from intercourse without even needing to have any external clitoral stimulation.
Drew: Gotcha.
Susan: Because her clitoris is, it’s like if we took all of the erectile tissue from your penis and we just went, Shazam. And we turned it into her erectile tissue it would be like this around her vulva. It’s all the way around. Culminating at the tip of the clitoris. But it’s all sensitive and all orgasmic, and so her vagina is actually wrapped in a bracelet. I call it the golden bracelet of pleasure. That all that erectile tissue gets plumped up with all that slowness and that love and that time and that encouragement. Her verbal encouragement, she gets engorged, then shes got her lady boner.
Drew: Yeah,
Susan: Her clitoral erection. And then just making love to her is all that she needs to have an orgasm. And it’s not even that cervix. Oh, it’s a. Cervical orgasm, like if you’ve gotta go all the way in and hit that thing hard. No, you don’t at all. Some women like that. Once they’re warmed up, other women, it hurts. They’re not, they don’t, haven’t had enough stimulation there. It’s not really about that because the tissue is really wrapped completely around that pocket. . So how’s that?
Drew: Yeah, that sounds amazing. It sounds, I mean, it sounds pretty simple, I think is, it is great for people to practice and like you said, people can go to MoreDrew.com for the workbook, right? There’s a workbook on this.
Susan: Yes. You download the thrust and time workbook.
Drew: Awesome.
Susan: Three and it goes through everything and it’s fun to read together. It’s fun to have an erotic play date where you’re practicing it. The first time. Don’t expect that you’re gonna know exactly how to do it the first time, you know?
Drew: Practice makes perfect. Just like anything else. So there you guys go. You’re welcome. And yeah, can’t wait to hear people’s testimonials and really grateful that you’re out there teaching this stuff to people. Cause I think, yeah, people can improve their sex life. It, it makes a world of difference in their just normal everyday life.
And I think it’s one of those things kinda like physical fitness, that if you get good at it and you stay consistent at it and you work at it, it can bring a lot of happiness and fulfillment and true life. Just from that one thing. And so, so yeah, go check it out you guys. And yeah, curious to know what you think.
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