I’m Susan Bratton, an intimacy expert to millions, and my hashtag is passionate lovemaking, which is what I’ve been all about for over 15 years.
I’ve been teaching passionate, heart-connected, conscious, passionate lovemaking techniques to singles and couples worldwide. You should transform having sex into making love with the things I teach you.
Right now, I’m about to give you the 15 steps to a passionate lovemaking date, Susan-Bratton-style.
Start with flirting as long before the date as possible. Flirt as much as you can. When you get to the actual date, I have a holding and hugging technique called the Soulmate Embrace, which you can download at soulmateembrace.com with directions to hold and be held in a way that you have always wanted, but never gotten.
What’s great is when you practice the soulmate embrace as a part of your lovemaking, it calms down your nervous system. It helps the feminine get into her body and out of her head. It starts the relaxation that is the foundation of arousal.
Instead of thinking about hot sex as “I’ve got to turn them on, I’ve got to spin these dials and push these buttons and stroke these things,” you want to think about, “First, I have to calm down the nervous system. I have to connect hearts, look in the eyes of my lover, and feel their touch and relax and respond to it.”
I have to let down my fluids. My mouth has to water. As I tell you this, my mouth is watering right now. My eyes might get a little bright, and my vagina begins to lubricate. My penis starts to awaken. That’s what the Soulmate Embrace does. It’s a crucial step in what is called lovemaking versus having sex.
Check it out. Then, you want to move into pre-foreplay, which is full-body touch. It’s about stroking my hair and kissing my cheeks, neck, and clavicle. Stroke me from top to bottom. It’s full-body touch.
It’s never grabbing breasts or the yoni. Yoni and lingam are the words for the vulva and the penis in tantric lovemaking, so I’ll use the phrase yoni a few times.
You want to get the body feeling good. When the body moves on its own, relaxes, and opens, you know that you’re ready to move into foreplay. At this point, think about working your way from the outside to the inside of her body. Learn how you can kiss and touch to open your lover to move towards and want more for me.
You do that by adoring and encouraging them. “God, you’re so handsome to me. I love your touch so much. You’re so beautiful to me. You’re so sexy to me.” The more specific your adoration, the better and easier it is for the person to take it in because it feels natural and less just said.
You want to encourage your partner. “I want you to have the best orgasms. Today, I want you to surrender to your pleasure completely. I’ve got you. Let me take care of everything. I will make you feel so good.”
I know you have it within you. Bring your lover out. Look them in the eyes. Connect your breath. Keep that touch going. If you find yourself just kissing and your hands are still, get them back into the action. Then, think about something I like to call triskelion, an ancient Celtic word for three interconnected spirals.
The triskelion is the breasts, lips, and yoni. Get them all working together. Breast play starts vaginal contraction. The kissing starts vaginal lubrication. They all work together, so you want to get all three of those intersecting circles working together. Before you begin oral pleasure, you’ve got to get the blood flowing. You’ve got to set in a base of blood flow to both the penis and vulva because they have the same amount of erectile tissue.
Watch my video on yoni massage. I will tell you exactly how to do it and in what order. You will love it. Please give her a yoni massage that gets the blood flowing. It gets all the erectile tissue full of blood and expands it.
It has more surface area that sends more signals to the brain for pleasure, and you get that orgasmic intensity.
After the yoni massage, I also recommend checking out a sex position called sweet spot oral. You can go to www.sweetspotoral.com. What’s great is that it shows you how to lay your lover out on pillows in a way that you can go down on them. You don’t get tired, and they can completely surrender to the pleasure and have orgasm after orgasm.
When you’re ready for penetration, I want you penis-owners to remember that your dick is not a piston. Think about it as a heart-tongue. Think about it as a feeling, living, beating, licking, touching, breathing appendage. Avoid thrusting in and out because it creates friction in the vagina. Instead, think of the vagina as a place for your penis—re-stroke the sides, bottom, and top.
I have a resource called Thrust In Time. It’s an ancient Taoist practice combined with a modern-day understanding of our body that allows a man to have unlimited stamina while taking a woman into a vaginal orgasm.
Men struggle the most with feeling like they can’t last long enough with women during intercourse. Women struggle with the feeling that they can’t achieve orgasm from intercourse.
Thrust in Time at thrustingtime.com is the single best intercourse technique I’ve ever created based on ancient Taoist practices combined with modern-day sexuality. There are a couple of different stroking techniques in that downloadable book that teaches you to use your penis as a heart-tongue. When you start doing that with your penis, your woman is guaranteed orgasms.
I just gave it away recently, and a woman wrote to me and said it was her first vaginal orgasm. “We tried it. I made it to five and fought and came just like you said.” I’m like, “I know! This is what I do and have been doing for a long time.”
So what’s lovely is you’ve taken the entire process, and it has worked beautifully for connecting you two together. You have a fun time. There’s one alternative way for passionate lovemaking I think is good. Instead of doing the yoni massage and the oral and then lovemaking, you can perform a yoni massage and a little oral.
You can have a little lovemaking. Then you can do some more oral. Then, you can do some more yoni massage and g-spot pleasuring. Get your hands, tongues, penises, vulvas all activated simultaneously and get the blood flowing in and bounce around from one thing to the other.
A few minutes can be fun and lead to an even better sex workout, and at the end, cuddles, kisses, and words of appreciation. I’m Susan Bratton, intimacy expert to millions, and I’ve got a great new video that I want you to watch called 20 kinds of orgasms. I go through 20 orgasms for men and women. I bet you didn’t know you could have so many, and now you do.
So watch that video, and before you go, I have a gift besides Thrust In Time. It’s at arousalsecrets.com. This is how to increase your sex drive and libido and feel more desire, arousal, and orgasmic intensity.
I have a video that explains how to turn sex into making love. If you liked this, you’d love that too.
I hope I’ll see you on the other side. I’m Susan.