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Looking to enhance your relationship in a way you haven’t tried before?
My conversation with Drew Manning may have the key to unlocking a deeper connection with your partner. We talk about the often-overlooked facets of relationships, including the crucial balance of physical and emotional intimacy.
Discover what intimacy really means for both men and women. Learn about a technique I personally use in my relationship. It’s called ‘The 3 Things I Love About You.’ This simple yet powerful practice fosters appreciation and open communication, reinforcing love and positivity in a relationship. Imagine hearing three things that your partner adores about you every day!
Transform how you interact with your partner and ultimately achieve a more fulfilling relationship by understanding the fascinating world of masculine and feminine energies. We break down the unique desires of men and women—women seeking adoration and feeling sexy, men craving respect and acknowledgment.
Drew and I agree on one thing: the immense power of gratitude. We emphasize the importance of appreciation in maintaining a vibrant relationship. And let’s not forget sex! We speak candidly about sexual health and its role in a thriving relationship—making it less of a taboo and more of an essential conversation.
In this engaging video, you’ll discover strategies for nurturing and enhancing your relationship. Don’t miss out on these invaluable insights—who knows, they might be the trigger for a deeper bond with your loved one.
Full Transcript
Drew: All right. What’s up everyone? Drew Manning here with Fit2Fat2Fit with Susan Bratton. How are you? How are you doing?
Susan: I’m doing great.
Drew: Yeah. Beautiful day out here.
Susan: I wanted to do this, so thank you for indulging me.
Drew: Of course.
Susan: It’s gorgeous out here. We had to do, come on, we had to do a water shot in Hawaii, right?
Drew: Yes. It’s beautiful. Yeah, it’s beautiful. And today we’re talking about something very special.
Susan: Yeah.
Drew: Right. Because like we talked about earlier, There’s a physical side of sexual intimacy, right? Mm-hmm. But there’s a mental, emotional component as well.
Susan: Yeah.
Drew: And one of the cool techniques that I’ve heard you talk about is three things I Love about You.
Susan: I Know.
Drew: So first, talk about what it is and why it’s so important.
Susan: Okay.
Drew: In relationships and how it leads to better sexual intimacy.
Susan: Okay. So when I first got married to Sir Tim 30 years ago,
Drew: sir Tim.
Susan: Yeah. Everybody calls him Sir Tim, cuz he’s a prince. Prince among men.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And it’s always good to marry a prince, you know, just a kind man.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And I didn’t have a very stable attached childhood and I was worried about a lot of things. I had security as my number one relationship value, and we’re gonna talk about relationship values in one of our segments that’s coming up. But what I realized that I needed was a lot of words of love and encouragement, and I needed them to be very, Specific and even to this day, 30 years later,
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: When we begin making love, like when we’re kind of in the foreplay stages.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: A lot of times I say to him, tell me three things you love about me.
Drew: Ah, yeah.
Susan: I need to hear him say it. So we started this. Little game.
Drew: Uhhuh.
Susan: Tell me three things I love about you for that I was allowed to ask whenever I wanted, whenever I just needed some words of encouragement.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: That I would just ask for it. And he had this idea that he would never say the same thing twice.
Drew: Gotcha. That’s what I was gonna ask. Cuz like if you do it every day, is it the same thing or can like is it to the idea to get creative every day? Like think about different things every day?
Susan: That’s it.
Drew: Okay.
Susan: Yeah. So if you have the practice of really just what we in California call dropping in, which means getting really present.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And then we ask for that and we think about, okay, what is it that I love about this person? And you hear different things all the time. Sometimes I wanna hear things about like, what a badass business woman. I am.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: How strategic my mind is.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: Sometimes I wanna hear about, you know, how I’m doing, build my muscles. Sometimes I wanna hear about how beautiful and sexy I am.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: Sometimes I wanna hear about what a great mother I am. You know, I want, I wanna be appreciated for all of the facets of all of the gifts that I bring into my marriage, and my husband likes it when I say things like the things that he does that I respect him for, or things that he’s done really well, or even simple things like, thank you so much for taking the trash out for the last 30 years, every single week without me ever once reminding you it was trash day.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: Like Thank you. Cause man, I don’t wanna kill the bugs. I don’t wanna take out the trash.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And so it’s just this idea that we all need to hear it. And so Tim and I have this practice and we do it all the time. And when other people have heard us, they’re like, wow, I’ve never done anything like that.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: You know, we kind of grew up in a stoic, we grew up in stoic households, a lot of us where there aren’t enough words of love and affection.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: So it’s just kind of being in gratitude every day and asking for. Whenever you need to hear it.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: Because we all have those moments where we just really wanna know we’re loved.
Drew: Yeah. Yeah. I think that’s really important. I, I remember a quote that someone told me before I got married. They said, people go where they’re invited, but they stay where their appreciated.
Susan: Oh, I love that.
Drew: And so I think it’s important to show your appreciation, cuz you do take things for granted where you’re like, oh, they’re gonna do this dishes, they’re gonna go grocery shopping, they’re gonna make the food.
They’re, that’s what they do. But you don’t appreciate them. And after a while, if they don’t. Feel that appreciation. It’s hard to stick around.
Susan: Yeah.
Drew: Right. With someone that doesn’t appreciate you. So this sounds like a great exercise to do for couples to show that appreciation on a daily basis or whenever they need it.
Right. Like cuz some days we need it more, maybe we’re feeling down or feeling hard on or beating ourselves up for something.
Susan: Yeah.
Drew: And it’s important to have that person be like, Hey. Sometimes you ask for it, but it’s also nice when you don’t have to ask for it. And the other person’s like, you know what, I really appreciate you for taking the trash out, whatever it is. Right. And I think that’s really important. So one of the things that we talked about earlier was the difference between masculine and feminine energies. And you mentioned your, your husband, he likes to hear differently than maybe the things you need to hear.
Susan: Yeah.
Drew: Right. And so what, what are the differences between like what a. Women should say to a man and vice versa.
Susan: Yeah. So women generally, because we’re estrogen dominant and we’re the prey.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And men are testosterone dominant and they’re the predators in our culture and society. Women don’t feel very safe.
Drew: Mm-hmm.
Susan: Men feel overly safe, honestly.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And you know, they feel like overly confident. I think a lot of times that can fight a guy for sure. But Oh, being overly, I think I know how to do this. Klonk!. Yeah. And then he walks through in his flippers or whatever.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And so for women, what we like are two things in equal measure. I always like to give these like little equations of balance.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And that is that what we want is adoration and we want to know we’re sexy to you.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: If you only were like, your foot looks so hot all the time.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: We would think you were objectifying us.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And if you only gave us adoration, you’d be like, aren’t we sexy?
Drew: Yeah. Yeah.
Susan: You know how that is. Oh yeah.
Drew: It’s like, okay, you’re sexy.
Susan: I gotta balance sexy.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: So it’s like I want, you gotta say, I love your Turkey meatloaf and your butt looks great in those jeans.
Drew: There you go.
Susan: And it’s like the perfect. It’s like a very big combination. And then for men, what they wanna know is that they’re respected and that they’ve done a great job.
So like, thank you for taking out the garbage is a really nice thing because it’s a thank you for doing a great job.
Drew: Yeah,
Susan: a respect is thank you so much, Drew, for showing up and doing all this crazy stuff with me.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And going with the flow. I really appreciate that you trusted me enough to just be like, okay, let’s go get in the water and talk about love.
Drew: Yeah. Yeah. I hear you. Yeah. That’s awesome.
Susan: I respect that. I respect your confidence and your willingness and your openness, so thank you.
Drew: I appreciate that.
Susan: Cause I wanted to tell you three things I love about you. One of them is how dimensionally you think about your fans
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And how much you care about them and how you’re really thinking about their whole life.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And what underpins their confidence and success in all that they do.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: So I really feel like you are someone who is trying to give a reframe of perspective to your fans and followers that will stand them on really solid ground inside themselves.
Drew: Okay.
Susan: That you stand for people really believing in themselves, and I really respect that about you.
Drew: Thank you. I appreciate that.
Susan: Another thing I love about you is that you’re just fun to be with. You’re very easygoing. You’re very charming. You’re just, there’s never any problems. It’s just very calm to be with you.
Drew: Yeah. Okay.
Susan: I’m like people who are calm.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: Because it gives me my number one relationship value, which is security. You make me feel safe.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: So I love that about you and I think that’s a beautiful masculine experience.
Drew: Thank you.
Susan: I mean, I came all the way to Hawaii to talk to you about making more love muscles.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: And thank you for going on that ride with me.
Drew: Yeah. Okay. I love one, how creative you are. Right. Coming up with love muscles is a very. Sign. It’s a sign that you have very creative thinking skills.
Susan: Thank you.
Drew: Which is impressive. Two, I love how you make sexual health or sexual intimacy so much more digestible. Right. And not as taboo. Because I think people, you’re bridging the gap between, you know, my parents’ generation and the future generation. If like people want better sex, you’re gonna have to talk about it. You’re gonna have to like get open about it. And learn and be open to learning, and you make it very digestible for people. And then the last thing I would say is that you help people understand how important good sex is, not just for the purpose of having good sex, but for relationships.
And so I think really what you’re doing, honestly is helping so many more people, not just with their sexual health and have having better sex, but better relationships and better relationships lead to happier people and happier people lead to a better civilization. So that was like, I dunno, three or five things.
Susan: That was good.
Drew: But yeah,
Susan: What and this, and this is interesting because now that when you start doing this, like you can teach your daughters how to do it,
Drew: yeah.
Susan: You can teach your friends how to do it. It really enriches your lives. Like one of my best friends, he’s constantly saying, I have three things I want, I love about you, but I have a bonus round too.
Like you can come up with even more.
Drew: Yeah.
Susan: So it enriches all of our lives to be gracious and in gratitude for how much we love everybody. Amen. It gets builds our heart muscles.
Drew: Amen.
Susan: And that’s what we’re here for. Strengthening our love muscles.
Drew: Strengthening our love. Amen. Thank you guys.
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